Apparently, it happens more often than you think. Or maybe, it's just what you call a midlife crisis of a sort. What do you do when the the things you used to be able to do you find you just can't manage to do, anymore? And we're not talking here about physical feats like no longer being able to do a bridge stand or a split (both things I was able to do at age 15). I'm referring to certain kinds of conversations that have lost their allure to the extent that the effort to participate in them can no longer be mustered without disagreeable discomfort.
It appears I have morphed into some kind of introvert, no longer endowed with the ability to gracefully flit and flutter into connections that do not at once engage. It is rather frightening to discover this in one's self. And it is difficult not to wonder whether it is some kind of temporary madness or something that has lodged into the character, for good. How strange to suddenly encounter yourself on the proverbial street in your mind and have no absolutely no recognition of what you have become, so much so that you feel you need an extended introduction.
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Kids on break
So what are you going to do about it?
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5 comments:
Oh lord, I really can relate. Maybe as we -- ehem -- get older, we find we have no time or patience for things we don't care to put up with any more. For instance, I used to be a model of diplomacy and tact but nowadays I just say what I mean, and how I see things (without being mean or nasty, of course). No more beating around the bush, life's just too short. :)
Hi Gigi! So nice of you to comment. Nicer still to discover I am not alone. The problem is, what if you try not to be mean and nasty, but it comes out that way, anyway? Good to hear from you...
Count me in the club of getting-olders! I never had a problem speaking my mind, but the problem was when I was younger I was constantly speaking! I allowed myself to be surrounded by people I didn't really like, in the belief that I had to try to be liked. Gets mo? Anyway, now my world's cleaner :)
Hi Apol! Gets na gets, mother. The scary thing about that, at least for me, was the realisation that I like so very few people. A clean life...hmmm I would guess so, and not just because you live in Provence, either (inggit inggit...)
I agree with Apol; the older we get, the more secure we are about ourselves and whether anyone likes us for it doesn't matter that much na. Pretty much like the septuagenarians in your Yin class who don't give a hoot (or should i say 'Poooot!') about breaking wind when transitioning into hip-stretching positions. Liberating, IS IT?????
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